The Distinguished Gourmand: Atrium

Once we were seated, the latecomers wanted to order cocktails. My cocktail glass was nearly empty so I moved on to wine. I started with the Gamay, which was served chilled. I liked it! But then I moved onto the Koehnen wines, orange and red, which I really really like. I know Koehnen from his days at Silver Lake Wine and will happily support him by choosing his wines when and where available. Whatever the red was, everyone at the table liked it and eventually ordered their own glasses. I stuck with wine through the meal while everyone else vacillated between cocktails and wine. Not that you care.

Grilled Focaccia, kimchi butter, buckwheat honey. Everyone was so hungry when we sat down they didn’t even let me photograph the grilled focaccia when it arrived at the table. I mean, it’s not like it’s important or anything. All I do is photograph every meal we share together and keep the minutes of all of our meetings. God forbid you wait for me to snap a photo before you start tearing off hunks of bread and dragging ’em across the attractively-plated kimchi butter. Emotional bitterness aside, I fucking loved this dish. I want to make kimchi butter all day every day and spread it on every single carb I can find. So, so good.

Hamachi Crudo, passion fruit nuoc cham, chiles, onion, viet herbs. Lots of places in LA do a hamachi crudo. I think Nobu serves one. Kanpai definitely serves one. They’re mostly a combination of hamachi, yuzu, and jalapeno (maybe with a single shred of carrot?). This is an entirely different beast, and it’s a delicious one at that. Super tropical, herbal and spicy, it made for a fantastic bite. I snuck an extra bite of this plate, which is not something I did throughout the meal. By the way, we ordered like 80% of the restaurant’s menu, and the coursing/pacing of the meal was perfect. 

Beef Carpaccio. Carne Asada, salsa macha, avocado crema, crispy potatoes. Maryn was all about the carpaccio. I thought it was pretty good. Around this time Mark was regaling us with a story about how police visited his place of work following a recent vandalism/theft in Hollywood. Afterwards, we discussed recent Netflix show, with a recap of an episode of Black Mirror that Mark and David LOVED/HATED in which — if I heard/interpreted properly — Street Fighter characters can fuck? Then meet in real life and kiss? K. Got it. This dish concluded our first “course” of the evening. I probably ordered another glass of wine at this time.

Crispy Broccoli Sprouts. Whipped tahini, burnt cinnamon vinaigrette, crispy rice, jicama. Yes, I know this picture sucks. Adam was all about these “sprizzles,” as he referred to them while ordering them (what an embarrassment). Until they arrived, that is. He gave up on the sprouts pretty quickly. As did I, to be honest. I wasn’t a big fan of this dish. Since this dish put Adam front and center of the table conversation, he veered us into a very annoying chat about an event some of us attended that none of us want to recall or talk about. Sorry, I’d get more into specifics but I have friends who read this page and I don’t want anyone to feel bad. If you and I are friends and you’ve had a big life event in the last five years…I swear we weren’t shit talking you. We were shit talking some other friend of mine. 

Crispy Oyster Mushrooms. Eel sauce glaze, smashed cucumbers, sesame, cilantro. YES! This was one of my favorite plates of the night. Once everyone took their little forkful and returned to whatever conversation Adam was dictating, David and I pretty much crushed whatever was left on this plate. Seriously, if you order any of the veggie-friendly dishes at Atrium, make this one of them. We had pretty much everything except for the cauliflower and this was a standout. 

Tandoori Spiced Artichoke, caper brown butter aioli. So, here’s the thing. I talk a big game when it comes to food. I’ve dined at most of the best restaurants in America. I call this series of posts The Distinguished Gourmand. AND YET! There are simple food-related things that I am completely clueless about. TWO of these things were embarrassingly exposed this evening. Number 1: I have no idea how to eat an artichoke. My fragile psyche when I announced, “How do you eat this?” was slightly buoyed by Maryn saying this was the first “miss” of the night. Okay, so I don’t know how to eat an artichoke. Well, this one apparently isn’t that good, so what did I miss, exactly? NOTHING. Someday maybe the GF will sit me down with an artichoke and teach me how to eat it…but honestly — even though she eats a mostly vegetarian diet — having shared hundreds of meals with her, I wouldn’t be surprised if she doesn’t know how to eat one either.

Uni Cacio e Pepe, trofie, tellicherry, peppercorn, pecorino. Like, let’s be honest, uni pasta is a pretty “safe” menu addition for restaurants these days. EMC Seafood still has the gaudiest preparation I’ve had in Los Angeles, and I prefer it to Atrium’s, but it can’t possibly be BAD no matter what. As delicious as this hearty, brine-y, cheesy dish was…I could nitpick a little. First, these…gemelli (?) were not the optimal pasta for cacio e pepe. I’d be surprised if any cacio e pepe used this shape pasta. Also, the pecorino and uni way overpowered the peppercorns! The best cacio e pepe I’ve had in LA is at Felix, and it was so good it didn’t need uni. It felt a little forced on this plate. That’s not to say it wasn’t tasty as hell…but I’m not going to heap praise on it for being a uniquely outstanding dish.

Charred Snow Peas, warm straciatella, meyer lemon kosho, seaweed breadcrumbs, mint. Remember that story about the artichoke? Here’s the thing. I also don’t eat a lot of peas. Nor do I eat a lot of snow peas. So…you can imagine Mark’s surprise when I asked him, for the second time tonight, “How do I eat this?” Cold hard fact Number 2: I’m more used to peas than snow peas. So, naturally, I thought you had to de-case them, like edamame or something. When Mark told me you could eat the whole pod, it might have been the first moment in 8+ years of Dinner Club that I felt truly embarrassed. There I was, the guy who ordered sweetbreads and brains at Animal…the guy who always demanded pig’s head at Rossoblu…the guy who demanded tripe and tongue at Kinjiro…confused about a snow pea. It was not my finest moment. 

Crispy Whole Fish, blood orange escabeche, carrot-turnip salad, cilantro, lime. Call me crazy, but I fucking hate whole fried fish. I don’t like the idea of eating bones. I think the meat of the fish is tarnished by the crispy skin crust. I think it looks unappetizing. It’s just not for me. Pig’s head? Sure. I’ll eat that shit fried (although I prefer it in the style of Au Pied de Cochon). But fish? Give it to me grilled, please. Or seared. I don’t need it fried. The saddest thing about this dish was that everyone was so geeked to eat the fish, no one bothered with those tasty veggies! Don’t worry, I ate them all.

Patchamama. Pork Chop Katsu, burnt apple bulldog sauce, cabbage slaw, pickled ginger. The main dish that I preferred was the pork chop. I snuck a couple extra bites of this plate, even though Nate moved over from his side of the table to talk my ear off about Dark, which he just started watching on Netflix even though I’ve been harping on it for, like…A YEAR. Nobody trusts my recommendations when it comes to pop culture shit. They listen to me drone on and on about my favorite movies, and obscure horror movies they’ll never watch, but when it comes to a simple Netflix recommendation NO ONE WANTS TO BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY SOMETHING IS GOOD. I told them The OA was the new Stranger Things. I told them the first season of Making A Murderer was going to a be a THING. Then I told them Dark was like a perfect cross between LOST and Twin Peaks…and no one listened. They never listen, dear reader. BUT YOU LISTEN TO ME, RIGHT? That’s why you’re still here? Okay. Good. I knew I could rely on you to stoke my ego. 

Dark Chocolate Budino, black sesame ice cream, peanut-cocoa brittle, salted caramel. I don’t care about dessert. I care about it in terms of “Does your establishment have a nice bottle of Port on the menu?” But not in terms of the actual pastries or whatever. The budino came highly recommended. It was fine. The Port was great!

I don’t even know what this thing is. I was kind of drunk by this point, but let’s just say it’s a scoop of vanilla ice cream in a bowl of syrup-infused shave ice. That is most definitely NOT what it is, but I’m looking at the menu trying to figure out what the hell it is and the options aren’t great. It’s not pannacotta, I’ve had that before and kind of know what it looks like. Maybe it’s the Creme Fraiche Mousse with raspberry granita, rhubarb sorbet, and feuilletine crack? I just don’t remember. Anyway, it was fine. As I said, I’m not into desserts. I don’t’ have a sweet tooth. I would have rather ordered the BBQ dusted potato fingerlings or the octopus al pastor and skipped dessert altogether. I guess I have reason to go back to Atrium now! Two of the dishes I most wanted to try didn’t even make it to the table!