I forgot to post one other video yesterday. Here’s drunk Katie smacking herself in the face with a full glass of whiskey and Coke. A few minutes later, I smacked myself in the teeth with the same glass. If you needed any more evidence of how plastered we were, look no further than this video.
My last day at home was mostly boring, then largely entertaining, then a little depressing. I will now recount the events of the day for your in the manner with which I am most comfortable: another stupid blog post. By the way, this page is about to move to the more powerful, more exciting WordPress engine. If all goes according to plan, within the next week you’ll have all kinds of crazy new things to play with, like the ability to create a personalized account to leave comments (complete with avatars!). I will also be able to dole out sub-accounts for those of you who desire to create your own posts for this page. Yup, things are about to get much more interactive around here. Hell, the header image might actually remain centered across all operating systems, browsers and screen settings! Stay tuned!
I awoke, as I am wont to do, too early. I feel like — even though I’ve been on vacation for ten days — I haven’t even once gotten a full night of sleep. My days still begin at 9:00am, even if I spend all my time daydreaming about sleeping in and waking up in the middle of the afternoon. My internal clock is so fucked up (and by fucked up I mean its operating on a perfectly normal schedule) I can no longer sleep for twelve or thirteen hours a day, like when I was unemployed. After rising from bed and stumbling downstairs, I toasted myself a bagel and grabbed a bottle of water. Then I sat on the couch and tried to answer some e-mails and fix this here website. I scanned a bunch of old ‘zines, which will be posted this coming week. I scanned a funny item that I want to submit to Found Magazine. I printed my boarding pass. Then I showered and dressed.
I spent all afternoon watching TV like a pathetic piece of shit with nothing better to do with his time. I guess I could have been writing, but Night Of The Living Dead was on, and I found it kind of inspiring. I can’t explain away the other four hours I spent stapled to my seat watching mindless drivel…but I’ve been running around seeing people for nine days; I’m allowed a day of rest.
At five o’clock I hopped in my [mother’s] car and headed down the Parkway to Sam and Lindsey’s house. They were happy to see me. I picked them up and we drove to the Chipotle on Route-1. Upon arriving at the fast-food joint, we quickly noticed there was a huge line, and that everyone inside was wearing tinfoil. The girls standing in front of us asked me to take some photos of them, and I learned that Chipotle was giving away free burritos to anyone who came dressed as a burrito. The rules were a bit vague. It appeared that all one had to do was affix a random piece of tinfoil to their body and they would be eligible for a free burrito. A young girl dressed as an elf, with silly little elf ears, must have heard my complaints about not having known this in advance, and she walked over and handed the three of us piece of tinfoil she had wrapped around her arms and torso. I molded a small piece of foil to my head, Sam fashioned a headband, and Lindsey made a necklace. That was all we need to get three free burritos. The only thing better than a Chipotle burrito? A free Chipotle burrito.
We retired to Sam and Lindsey’s place, played with the dogs, took some photographs, and watched a Louie C.K. stand-up special. Then I drove home, packed my things, and went to meet Jack and Ken at the diner. It was a good way to cap my trip home. I depart in the morning, I’ll be back in L.A. tomorrow afternoon. I’ll try to post something interesting tomorrow night.
Hey, I hope if any of you reading this website chose to use one of my Halloween costume ideas this year, you’ll provide me with a photograph of your costume. Considering my average number of unique visitors this week hovered around 950 per day (most of which were referred by my top ten costumes list), I’d be very sad if none of you dressed up as dead Heath Ledger or a rapist. Very, very sad.
Assemble Head In Sunburst Sound – The Corner Zombies
Leonard Cohen – Hey, That’s No Way To Say Goodbye
Pocahaunted – No More Women
Quieting Syrup – Passwords To A Fort Full Of Pills
Black Heart Procession – We Always Knew
Sunburned Hand Of The Man – The 1st Degree
