Seeing as how nobody chose to comment on yesterdays rant, I’m led to believe that either a) it was so awe inspiring and truthful it left you speechless, or b) it was so brainless and off-the-mark it left you speechless. Either way, you’re dumb-stricken, and I couldn’t be more proud. And hey, I beat the nerdlingers at Pitchfork to breaking the story, so that has to be good for something, right!?
So, Jean Baudrillard is no longer existing in hyperreality, but hyper…what’s the opposite of reality? Fantasy? Hyperfantasy? That’s not funny. Hyperextinction, now that’s funny. I need to strengthen my vocabulary if I’m going to continue to treat people as nothing more than props for my own brand of comedy. Which, by the way, is the most accurate description for how I live my day-to-day life. If I wanted to be really narcissistic (I am narcissistic—as is anyone who interviews himself), I’d respond to people who ask, “What do you do?” with, “I am a prop comic who uses people as props,” or “My life is one long performance art piece.” Imagine if I really said that to girls at bars? Would it work better than saying I’m a writer? Well, girls? Which of those makes you wettest?
Oh, right, Baudrillard. Dead. Funny guy, that Baudrillard, with his silly, confusing logic that teeters on the brink of complete nonsense. Kind of like me. In a sense, Baudrillard was the father-figure I never had and didn’t dream about having until this precise moment, because it’s a timely thought to have while writing the least fascinating obituary anyone is going to write about him.
Also, post-modernism. The end.
Note: I should have mentioned it at the end of yesterday’s entry (because it’s related), but everyone should make a donation to WFMU before March 18th. They’re in the midst of their yearly marathon, and the country’s foremost freeform station is hoping to raise about 900K to cover their bills for the coming year. I’m doing my part by donating $75, even though I have no money and no (real) job. You, on the other hand, probably have some money (and maybe a job!), so what better way to spend it—and then write it off as a tax deduction—than to ensure another year of top-notch radio programming.
