I was out the other night with some friends when I stumbled into what I would consider to be the most uncomfortable conversation imaginable: A writer talking to a writer about what they write. Other than that stretch of time when I used this space as a “Dear Diary” for writing and trying to sell a book, I’ve never really done much to promote the fact that I write. I don’t keep a portfolio of published works. I don’t consider paid bylines on other websites or ‘zines to be serious writing. And since I don’t make a living as a freelance writer, or as an author, it is impossible for me to define myself as a writer by trade. Yet when I’m in social situations and people ask me what I do I’ll often describe my day job while sprinkling in some copywriting or editing experience to make me sound like a more well-rounded person. For a guy who despises any string of autobiographical words that might come across as self-promotion, having to answer questions like “What do you do?” is to skate on the thinnest of ice. God forbid I wind up mentioning writing to someone who turns out to be a writer, you might as well sheer several millimeters off whatever fraction of frozen water is keeping me from total collapse.
That preamble is basically my verbose way of saying I found myself being asked what I write about the other night and the only thing I could respond with was, “Dead pets.”
Talk about your classic conversation killer.
As a guy with a big mouth and no filter I’m used to confounded looks when I speak out of turn. I’ve gotten the “Ew gross bye” from girls at bars. I’ve confronted more furrowed brows than I’d like to admit. The response to my dead pets remark was a pretty unique one. Maybe had I flown home to New Jersey to confess to my father my lifelong desire to be a ballet dancer I would be the recipient of a look on par with “Dead pets.”
Oh well. For social situations where you feel like you just can’t win (or impress, or even carry on with idle chat for more than…I don’t know, five minutes?) at least there is always alcohol. And afterwards I can come home and crash on my couch and chuckle about it and put together a little mix tape for random Internet strangers.
Sunday Mix Tape Number 399
…And Other Regrets
01. Oranssi Pazuzu – Saturaatio
02. Tim Hecker – Castrati Stack
03. The House Of Love – She Paints Words In Red
04. Chelsea Wolfe – I Love You All The Time
05. Chihei Hatakeyama & Dirk Serries – Kulde
06. Purling Hiss – Fumble Tumble
07. Marissa Nadler – Janie In Love
08. Thomas Koner – Tiento De La Luz (6)
09. Nisennenmondai – #3
10. Ennio Morricone – Una Fotografia
