Pomona, California is playing host to this year's LA County Fair (Aug. 31st - Sep. 30th). Do you like carnys? Do you like thrill rides? How about something called a Zombie Mansion? Do your jeans come with an elastic waistband? If you've answered "yes" to any of these questions, you should head on out to the fair this year. See the sights. Gawk at the people. Eat and drink until you're about to burst. Then hop on the ferris wheel and throw it all up when you reach the top!
Grab yourself an ice cold 'rita to help you wash down all the food you're about to consume, you disgusting glutton, you. For $12 you get your standard 'rita, but for $15 you get the "Cadillac" version, with an extra shot. I took down 2 Cadillacs, but it wasn't easy (shitty margaritas are pretty gross after a while).
Seriously, these things (that is, deep-fried cookie dough) were so perfectly fucking perfect. Click to see the full size image. The chocolate sauce is so beautiful you can see the world reflected in it. I gave the last one away to a complete stranger, and he told me I made his day. Also it was so rich and gooey and opulent I couldn't eat more than two.
I'm a fan of frog's legs, and let me tell you they are way better deep-fried than they are at a Korean restaurant. Those Koreans just like to throw 'em on a grill and give 'em to you blackened. No way. That's not right. You need your tartar sauce. You need some ketchup. Well, YOU need that. I ate them "AS-IS", with no sauce. And they were delicious. Could have done with a little salt and pepper, but other than that they were perfect.
Maybe after your first round of fried foods you need to stop off at the Pearl White station and have your teeth whitened. That's what this guy did. He's making the most of his LA County Fair experience.
That there on the bottom is what the pros (also known as the folks at the Ten-Pound Bun stand) call Bacon Nutella Pizza. It comes on a hefty slice of sourdough bread. Honestly, this was the most disappointing taste of the fair. There simply wasn't enough bacon on the pizza for it to match the nutella spread.
Sometimes you just need a few veggies to round out your well-balanced, deep-fried meal. You can find these beautifully-fried onions, mushrooms and zucchini's at the Chicken Charlie's stand (1103 Palm). They also offer deep-fried Kool-Aid, Klondike Bars, avocados, Twinkies, and everything else with the red-and-white checkerboard paper you see in these photos.
For me, this was one of the highlights of the evening. Yeah, you could find your way to the BBQ Chicken stand that had deep-fried bacon cheeseburgers, and you might think that's the greatest fried food ever. But those guys are just frying the patty, then putting it on a regular bun. At Chicken Charlie's they take an entire White Castle slider and batter it then fry it. And it tastes heavenly.
If you allow it to, the LA County Fair might just provide you with moments of perfection like this one.
Other times, you might drink too much margarita mix and eat too many fried foods too quickly, then you decide you're kind of trashed and feeling gross. Maybe you should just sit down under one of the ferris wheels and watch the people walking by for a few minutes. You know, just long enough for you to remember how to walk again.
And once you regain your composure, it's time to hop aboard Le Grande Wheel (the tallest transported ferris wheel in the world, or so the sign says) and soak in the sights.
Yup. Life appears to be quite perfect when you're buzzed and there's gallons of oil coursing through your veins and you're sitting at the top of the world.
Even the other ferris wheels seem tiny and insignificant from the top of Le Grande Ferris Wheel. That might have just been the mushrooms talking, though.
How would you conclude a night at the LA County Fair? Well, I don't have much of a sweet tooth, but I do have a soft spot for Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. Texas Donuts called to me like a siren to its rocky coast.
At $4.50, it might just be the greatest investment you will ever make in your entire pathetic excuse for a life.
Burmese – Stripped Clean [MP3]
