I was chatting with an old friend from high school this morning, about weddings, moving from city to city, and food. We were reminiscing about some of our old haunts (well, one specifically) in and around our hometown. It made me feel old, and it didn’t help that while this conversation was occurring I was admitting to another friend via IM that I think my laziness in regards to finding new music is the result of age. As soon as one starts to think about “the old days,” it goes without saying the mind begins to wander. I started to consider all the hang outs and places I frequented when I was toiling away in suburban New Jersey. I came up with this list. How many do you recall? What was the closest analogue you had growing up?
• The Ground Round – Was on Route 10 in East Hanover. Although it might have been on the Livingston side of Route 10? I don’t remember exactly. It’s a franchise place (although it never felt like it when I was in grade school). It was a family restaurant with a family room where they projected old black-and-white films on a large screen, every table received free baskets of popcorn, and the burgers were the staple of the menu. They had to be lightly grilled or griddled, the burgers, because I always hated charcoal broiled or heavily grilled burgers growing up. I used to ask my mom “does it have the lines on it?” and if it did, I wouldn’t eat it. I was picky. They closed this place, and according to my sister (who’s a year older than me, so her adolescent memories should be one year clearer) what opened in its place was Sports ‘N Games, but I don’t think that was the same location. Speaking of which…
• Sports ‘N Games – When I was in middle school this was the place to have your birthday. You could always tell when that colored postcard arrived in the mailbox that someone was having a birthday party there. And even though I almost always had my own birthday parties at Crescent Golf Range, when Sports ‘N Games came around we started having my parties there. The food was disgusting in that way that kids love (square pizza, french fries), there was one of those ball rooms with ladders and tunnels where you could quasi-molest your female classmates, and they had all those arcade games and ski-ball machines that rewarded you with tickets that could be exchanged for prizes. At some point they installed batting cages and laser tag. Then the entire building was transformed into indoor go-kart racing. It’s called Funplex now. I don’t know what’s there but it couldn’t be as fun as Sports ‘N Games was.
• The Colony Theater – This used to be the little triplex in Livingston that was demolished as part of the new Town Center that was built around the time I graduated in college. There were some years between its closing and its demolition where we prayed it’d be reopened as a little indie/art-house place, but that never came to be. I’m pretty sure either my sister or I had a birthday party here at some point during the ’90s. Then the multiplex on Route 10 came along and destroyed its business. Ah, suburbia. Where soda shops like Silverman’s and little theater’s like The Colony remind us of simpler, better times until multi-million-dollar shopping centers and condominiums come along and wipe those memories clean.
• JP Lee’s – The little Mongolian barbecue place in Millburn, which was probably my favorite place to eat in high school and college. It closed a few years ago, and in its place there’s a crummy little Chinese place that’s just as out-of-place as JP Lee’s was in the otherwise affluent suburb. All-you-can eat buffet was ten dollars, and from the first time I ate there until the last time I ate there my order never once changed. I’d fill my bowl until it overflowed with noodles, add in a little bit of pork or beef, a tiny serving of carrots, and a heaping load of the spicy szechuan sauce. Then they’d ‘cue it up on that round plate and scoop it back into the bowl, and I would devour it. As I grew up I got to know Charlie, the owner, a little bit. Every time I’d walk in he’d ask, “Hey, how’s your love life?” and I’d always tell him, as if he was really interested. He’d write down astrological information for me. He told me what months I should look for in a girl. JP Lee’s was everything I looked for in a restaurant: untouched by time, that big poster with the quote from the radio food critic about “gastronomic portions” hanging on the rear wall, always with Charlie there to make small talk, and the little autographed headshot of David Faustino from Married With Children behind the cash register. It was the best.
• Cucci’s (née Cucci’s Magic Table) – The little Italian place near the Turtleback zoo. I used to come here for birthday dinners with my family, but because I was so picky I would just get spaghetti and butter. For some reason though (my guess? it was the butter) it always tasted like the best spaghetti in the whole world.
• Don’s – Perhaps the pinnacle of Livingston restaurants of yore. This was less than a mile from my house, and the most common destination for family dinners when I was a child. I have so many memories of Don’s, from my old day camp counselor (also named Evan) waiting tables to the pickle bar, my mom slapping the shit out of my sister in the small waiting room out front one time, the amazing bakery — where “Snoopy cakes” were procured for our birthdays — to all the family portraits hanging from the walls. While waiting (there was always a wait) for tables we’d wander around the place looking to see which families from town had recently had their portraits taken (note: we never did) and spying items from the bakery that we’d want to take home for dessert (cupcakes with wild frosting colors or frosting built to look like children’s TV show characters were always a hit). They were known for their burgers and hot dogs, but I didn’t like the burgers. I only ever ordered grilled cheese with french fries and a vanilla milkshake. They grilled the bread in copious amounts of butter so it was, to my young tastebuds, outstanding. Although it closed at least 15 years ago people still remember Don’s fondly. And, in looking to Google to find other posts about the restaurant, I learned that Don passed away a few years ago (here’s an obit), and that someone is trying to reopen Don’s (with the late owner’s blessing) in Morristown. Weird.
Jealousy – Drug Sores [MP3]
