From Delhi

Good morning from the Eastern Hemisphere. It’s 7am Friday local time at the Jaypee Siddharth hotel in Delhi. It’s been a very long…uh…honestly I lost track of the date and time, so I don’t remember how long ago I left (flight took off Wednesday at 8:45pm) or how long I’ve actually been in India. Let’s just say I’ve been here for roughly 12 hours, even though I technically left America 36 hours ago. Yeah…this is going to get really confusing, really quickly. By the way, if you MUST fly 14 hours from Newark, NJ to Delhi, I suggest you do so first class/business class, because that was a pretty remarkable experience. I pretty much had my own little escape pod that transformed from a seat into a bed, with my own private TV larger than your typical 15″ MacBook Pro screen, and I was fed like a king the entire time we were airborne. Dinner was a salad, these delightful little fried vegetable kabobs, lamb chops with risotto and green beans, a bottomless bread bowl, all the French and Australian red wine I could drink (with a belly full of Xanax), a goat cheese plate with crackers and grapes…I didn’t even have room for the ice cream sundae. Oh well. The wine-and-Xando combination enabled me to sleep for six hours. Then I watched Rise Of Planet Of The Apes (a resounding “meh!”), Horrible Bosses (more like Horrible Movie!) and Hot Tub Time Machine (ha!). Breakfast was more bread, a mushroom omelet and a side of poatoes au gratin. Dominant way to start the day…even though we landed at 8pm at night. What the fucking fuck? The airport in Delhi is really nice. According to someone on my plane it used to be a real dump, and it was barely accessible due to insane traffic and animals roaming the streets (both of which are common here, apparently). So apparently they built these new elevated roads leading to/from the airport where animals are not allowed. As we waited for our transport a cadre of locals — most of whom were small children — shouted and waved down to use from the elevated road, welcoming us to Delhi. It was pretty sweet. The ride to the hotel took a while due to traffic. The Jaypee Siddharth is a really nice place, although it smells a bit of sewage outside my room. Also I’ve got a male roommate and the wall separating my bed from the bathroom/shower is frosted but with streaks of clear glass, which doesn’t leave a lot of privacy for whoever is in the shower. We arrived at the hotel at about 10pm, and after getting situated in the room Elissa and I went down to the tapas bar in the lobby for a late-night snack and some booze. I ordered a bottle of Kingfisher (225 rupee, or about $4.50) and she a double rum and Diet Pepsi. She also ordered a small plate of “Dragon Spring Rolls,” which tasted like a fried vegetable dumpling, with a nice fiery dipping sauce. We mingled with some people who were also in the bar for a night cap. Rumors swirled that there’s some kind of Australian women’s swim team staying at the hotel, but this has not yet been validated. Trust me, if they’re here, I’ll find ’em. Today includes trips to several local holy sights. That’s pretty much all I know at this point. For now I’ve got to shower and dress and pack an overnight bag, because they’re picking up our luggage to take it out to the desert in a few hours, leaving me with just a backpack for the next few days when we’re taking a train to the middle of who-the-fuck-knows where.