Written and produced by Albert Brooks and Harry Shearer, this one-sided 7″ record from 1974 should help you find your Christmas spirit! I remember giggling like a little girl the first time I heard the record, and hopefully you will too. It’s a conversation between a father (Brooks) and his daughter (credited as “Little Kristi”) about the holiday and the practice of gift giving. It was released on Asylum Records, and really isn’t that hard to find should you want to obtain a copy of your own. I’ve included the first dozen seconds of the script as a teaser. Enjoy! Merry Christmas to those who celebrate it. And to Jews like Albert Brooks and I, well…at least we only have to deal with this crap for one more day.
Kristi: Daddy, why is there Christmas?
Brooks: Well, honey, that’s what this record is all about.
Brooks: Um, what did you ask me, sweetheart?
Kristi: About Christmas- What am I getting, Daddy?
Brooks: (chuckles) “What am I getting, Daddy?” You know, honey, we’re all guilty of saying that. But I didn’t hear you asking what you were giving. And getting without giving, honey, is like eating without swallowing; it’s disgusting.
Kristi: I don’t understand!
Brooks: Yes, you do, sweetheart. Remember what I told you once about Santa?
Kristi: Anita?
Brooks: No, no, no, pumpkin. Santa Claus, sweetheart.
Kristi: You said, “He knows when you’re sleeping and he knows when you’re not sleeping. So for goodness sake!”
Brooks: Well, darling, your paraphrasing makes me chuckle. Sometimes I wonder if, through sheer stupidity, children aren’t just as smart as any grownup.
Anyway, lovey, Santa knows who’s asleep and who’s not, but he also knows something else. He knows the Meaning of Christmas. And do you know what that is?
Kristi: It’s all about love and sharing love and giving love.
Brooks: That’s beautiful, dumpling!
Kristi: …How do you make love, Daddy?
…
Albert Brooks / Harry Shearer
A Daddy’s Christmas
Side A – A Daddy’s Christmas
