I neglected to mention how earlier this week that Phoebe, Nicci and I went to see “Recap Rock” band Previously On Lost at Spaceland. If you are unfamiliar with the band, they are a group of nerds from Brooklyn who write songs that recap Lost episodes. The concept seemed intriguing. Unfortunately, the few song samples I heard on MySpace left much to be desired. The band’s set was quite entertaining. They passed out leis, they had two band members dressed in Dharma Initiative jumpsuits, there was a giant cut-out of J.J. Abrams’ head, and even a few inflatable palm trees on stage. The songs — one for every episode of the show — ranged from bad to decent. Musically, the band is not so good. The lyrics, though, were generally great. A song from the perspective of Aaron about his need for a father figure? Awesome. Rhyming “Sayid” with “die-eeee” and “cry-eee”? Hilarious. There was a cloyingly silly couplet or two sprinkled throughout, but we laughed almost through the entire show.
Which brings me to today’s Top Ten list. Why aren’t there more bands devoted to television shows? Imagine if more bands like Previously on Lost were touring the country, bringing joy to fans of classic TV shows wherever they travelled? I could think of ten amazing television programs that are in desperate need of a tribute band to keep their legacies alive.
Ten TV Shows In Need Of Their Own Recap Rock Bands
10. Spaced – People still don’t know about this show, even though it’s one of the funniest programs that has ever aired. It was certainly one of the funniest programs to come from Britain, that’s for sure. The fact that most of the plot revolves around the boring day-to-day activities of the two main characters (but using Hollywood epic cliches so as to appear extraordinary), the perfect recap rock band would pen huge, anthemic rock songs, and then the lyrics would be mumbled bullshit about sitting around looking for jobs or drinking coffee. That was Spaced, for the most part.
09. Quantum Leap – An epic Sci-Fi series starring Dean Stockwell and the guy from Necessary Roughness. Each song could be entirely different (like all the characters Scott Bakula leaped into), but — if done correctly — a song would end on the same note that began the next song. Just like how we got teasers of the next episode in the last minute or two of each episode! Now that would be genius. The style of music would have to be a bit “cerebral”, lots of angular riffs, maybe some interesting time signatures or many stop-start “math”-y rhythms, because the main character of the show was a fucking quantum physicist.
08. Married…With Children – This one would be interesting. It’s a quirky show, a funny show, an adult-themed show, and it was actually boycott once or twice, if I remember! I guess the prospect of having to write 250+ songs for each episode might seem daunting at first, but surely there is a band of able-minded and able-bodied musicians who are up to the task of documenting the history of one of America’s all-time greatest television shows on an episode-to-episode basis. I’d particularly like to hear a song devoted to the episode where Al forgets the words to a particular song and goes around town humming the same three words to everybody he meets. “Hmm Hmm…Him” for five minutes would be incredible. Like Faust’s “It’s A Rainy Day, Sunshine Girl”.
07. Arrested Development – A ukulele-led band singing about a torrid George Michael / Maeby love affair, or describing a series of Gob’s magic tricks might be one of the funniest Recap Rock bands I’ve ever dreamt into existence…and I’ve dreamt up three! The only problem with this show is that there were usually several subplots running through each episode, so it would be hard to really rein it in and focus on a solid, concise summary. Although, not many shows contain more subplots than Lost, and the dudes from the band Previously On Lost sure handled all that subject matter well.
06. Battlestar Galactica – I don’t really like this show, but almost everyone I know does. I got through half of the mini-series (which Nate wanted Nicci and I to watch all in one sitting) before giving up on the show. I just think that a gnarly space-rock band like White Hills would do great justice to the super-out-there Sci-Fi lyrics required of a show like Battlestar Galactica. Imagine the possibilities with all those swirling analog delay pedals and thunderous drums. It’s the perfect background noise for a lengthy Cylon/Human space battle recaps.
05. Deadwood – If only because every single song would have to prominently feature the word “Cocksucker”. If the band sounded like Calexico (1997-2003), that would be incredible. If they sounded like Earth (2005-2008) it would be even better. The show’s run was short enough (3 seasons, 36 episodes) that it wouldn’t be too difficult to take the entire series posthumously.
04. The Twilight Zone – By far one of my favorite programs ever. I don’t know from The Twilight Zone post-Original Series (1959-1964), but those first 156 episodes are, without question, some of the best television. Period. I envision a recap rock band taking a somewhat progressive sound (maybe like a Goblin-penned film score) and fleshing the songs out with lyrics that mirrored the metaphors inherent in the old episodes. Songs about morality, war, the human condition and existential crises. It would have to be as amazing as the show to impress me, and the show was phenomenal.
03. Seinfeld – It’d be pretty cool, right? A song about helping Keith Hernandez move? A song about the difference between flying first class and coach? A song detailing any of the program’s under-appreciated Kramer/George scenes? God, put those two alone in a scene together and watch the magic! What about “The Ballad of Joel Rifkin”, or a twelve-minute, sprawling saga about Elaine and David Puddy. So many great lyrical opportunities.
02. Home Movies – I think I’d rather see a band devoted to playing all the songs written into Home Movies episodes than playing songs that summarize episodes of the show. It really wouldn’t be hard, because the creators of the show included a CD with all the series’ songs on it with the Season 4 DVD. Get a band together, burn the CD for everyone, commit all the songs to memory, and you’ll have one of the greatest, funniest TV-related bands ever conceived. In the same vein, I wish there was a band that covered all the songs from The Sifl and Olly Show.
01. Twin Peaks – If any television show could rival the greatness of Lost, it would have to be Twin Peaks. The weird, layered, dark elements of the show are perfect for a recap rock band. The show itself had three soundtrack albums, all of which were written by Angelo Badalamenti, and all of which are really good. One of them even reached #1 on the music charts! (…In Australia!) What I wouldn’t give for a band with a sick Badalamenti-sound (Oh, the tremolo! Oh the baritone guitars!) merged with some Lynch-ian lyrics loosely related to the events of each episode. It’d be fucking incredible.
