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I would like to take this opportunity to extend a “Happy New Year,” to all you friends and enemies and people who just come here for the free music. I hope you had fun last night, whether you chose to spend the holiday with friends, family or the lonely douchebags at your local watering hole. Now that 2008 has arrived we can all begin anew, with clean slates, and try to convince ourselves that this will be the year everything changes. Unfortunately, four out of five people who make New Years resolutions such as these eventually break them. In fact, one third of us won’t even make it until the end of January.

I’ve gone and made things really difficult for myself by finalizing my 1001 Day Project list. If you didn’t read earlier this month, I decided that I was going to take the challenge issued by the Day Zero website and attempt to complete 105 (normally it’s 101, but I’m slightly more ambitious than most) preset tasks in a period of 1001 days. It’s like making 106 separate resolutions, I suppose, and spanning them out over the next two-and-three-quarters years. I don’t want to share the entire list with you, as that would be boring, but I’ll give you some highlights, and I’ll give updates every few months to keep you informed of my progress. Actually, I’ll print the entire list now. Whatever, I don’t give a shit.

105 THINGS TO DO IN 1001 DAYS PROJECT (01-01-08 to 10-28-10)

Family / Friends
001. Return to New Jersey and visit with family at least once a year.
002. Treat my father, mother and sister each to a nice meal.
003. Visit the graves of my grandmothers.
004. Send one handwritten letter a month for 6 months.
005. Send a gift to someone for no particular reason.
006. Say something positive/uplifting to a friend each day.
007. Host a party.
008. Purchase card and gift for each immediate family member’s birthday for one year.

Health / Food
009. Find a doctor and schedule healthy check-ups.
010. Find a dentist and schedule regular visits.
011. Find a good multi-vitamin, take one each day from that moment on.
012. Try 100 new foods.
013. Go to Venice Beach. Start walking north. See how far I get.
014. No soda pop for one week.
015. Drink the recommended daily allowance of water (50fl) for one month.
016. Subtract “fast food” from my diet for one year.
017. Bake My Own Bread.
018. Learn how to make Fawn’s vegan sushi. Make it for friends.
019. Eat a piece of fruit every day for a month.
020. Buy a fixed-gear bike to ride instead of drive locally.
021. Do 100 sit-ups every night before bed.
022. Do a system cleanse.
023. Eat vegan for one week.
024. Make my own tortilla chips in the deep fryer, make salsa to go with it.
025. Try ten new styles of cuisine.
026. Fast for 24, 48 and 72 hours.
027. Eat the fried egg / chili / bacon / cheeseburger at Fatburger.

Projects: Artistic / Creative
028. Get my book published.
029. Put together a band for live shows/recordings
030. Have 10 friends recommend a book, and read all ten.
031. Read five books about L.A.
032. Make a collection of favorite poetry.
033. Watch all unseen movies in AFI’s Top 100 List.
034. Create stencils for ironic/uncouth t-shirts.
035. Write a screenplay.
036. Write one song a day for one week.
037. Learn to read music.
038. Think of a unique, marketable idea and try to sell it.
039. Put out an album for an artist/band you enjoy.
040. Have an article published in a newspaper/magazine.
041. Wear a suit one day for absolutely no reason.
042. Call into a radio show.

Home
043. Rescue a dog from a shelter – keep it alive!
044. Find a residence and sign a long-term (or open-ended) lease.
045. Make your bed every morning for one month.
046. Clean, then maintain a spotless bedroom floor.
047. Vacuum whenever you think “this room needs to be vacuumed”.
048. Paint something and hang it on a wall.

Financial
049. Find advertisers for website, make some money.
050. Get a job that pays better than the record store.
051. Pay one month’s rent entirely from blog income.
052. Sell at least twenty items on eBay / Craigslist.
053. Give money to a beggar. Get money from a beggar.
054. Spend $0 For One Week.
055. Donate $2 to charity for each task on this list not completed.

Travel / Leisure
056. Visit remaining 13 states I have not visited.
057. Drive cross-country again.
058. Go on one multi-night camping trip.
059. Go on a real picnic.
060. Go SCUBA diving.
061. Attend a Lakers game and a Clippers game.
062. Take one of the long hikes in Joshua Tree.
063. Drive to Mexico
064. Ride a roller coaster.
065. Attend a rally or protest.
066. Drive the PCH up to San Francisco.
067. Drive to Vancouver.
068. Spend a summer day in Death Valley.
069. Sleep on a beach one night.
070. Fly somewhere first-class.
071. Make a list of local weird sites, visit twelve.
072. Visit the remaining two Pizza Port locations.
073. Tour 5 breweries.
074. Visit 5 museums.
075. Memorize the Alpha Bravo Charlies.
076. See a theatrical production.
077. Take The Scientology “Free Stress Test” with a friend.
078. Attend Dia de los Muertos at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery.

Personal / Capitalist Urges
079. Have name printed in newspaper, in a positive article.
080. Buy a nice pair of sunglasses.
081. Do not use a computer for one week.
082. Do not say anything sarcastic for one week.
083. [Private] Some things aren’t for public eyes
084. [Private] Some things aren’t for public eyes
085. [Private] Some things aren’t for public eyes
086. Try five new beers each month.
087. Buy something from the Rose Bowl flea market.
088. Don’t speak for an entire day.
089. Have the guts to play poker at a casino in Vegas.
090. Pay for the car behind me at a fast food drive-thru.
091. Learn and identify 10 constellations.
092. Buy a Jerry Jones baritone guitar.
093. Buy either a Hiwatt, Orange, or Sovtek guitar amplifier.
094. Buy a nicer camera than the one I have.
095. Make a new 101 in 1001 list.
096. Write three letters of complaint for a bad product/customer service.
097. Convince somebody else to create a 101/1001 list.
098. Win something. Anything.
099. Visit a psychic.
100. Buy An Extraordinarily Expensive Bottle of Bourbon.
101. Subject myself to hypnosis. Why? I don’t know, just because.

I understand how completely retarded this is. In fact, it seems like something that only people who’ve read The Secret would partake in. Well, we all need different ways to motivate ourselves, I guess this is mine. Noble? Yes. Gay? Probably also yes.