Getting through today’s Mix Tape without making a complete ass of myself is going to take a portion of my cunning. No, wait…all of my cunning.
Let me explain.
RULES for uninitiated noobs: With 100MB of webspace, I give birth to a weekly Mix Tape to be deposited on your iPods or Zunes or Kingklangs or whatever the industry is currently pushing on you. Sometimes there will be themes that link all the songs together, other times I’ll just throw songs at a wall (not literally) and see what sticks.
IMPORTANT: Tonight you all have the rare opportunity to listen to “guilty pleasure” music. That is, songs I have on my hard drive (digitized versions of vinyl records) or in my CD collection that nobody really knows about, because to publicize my ownership of said albums would tarnish my outstanding reputation amongst the Illuminati of the rock ‘n roll underground. Yes, I listen to the songs you are about to hear. Maybe not with regularity, but each track on this mix is has a special place in my heart for one reason or another. That’s why each song is accompanied by a short blurb. I mean — God forbid you assume I like these tunes for no reason other than my thinking they are catchy! There is no irony in these selections, I (gasp!) genuinely enjoy them.
These songs will be removed if desired by the band or those who represent them. Let me know and I will gladly comply. The goal of this endeavor, as always, is to pique your interest in these artists so you’ll support the artists and buy their albums. And really, there is no reason not to. Most of these can be purchased for anywhere between fifty cents and two dollars. Unless of course, you’re afraid somebody might find it in your collection.
Sunday Mix Tape Number 80 – “In Which I Jettison The Respect Of My Peers”
01. Smashing Pumpkins – To Sheila – Anymore, the only Smashing Pumpkins album I find myself listening to is Adore. I haven’t sold the others just yet, but this and Gish are the only two that I don’t keep hidden on my record shelf. I cannot deny the fact that I was a huge Smashing Pumpkins fanboy for most of my adolescence (sometimes to an obsessive degree). They were the first band I ever wanted to see live, and they are now the last band I would ever be caught dead listening to. But I like Adore, especially at four in the morning after drinking a bottle of cough syrup! I think loyal reader Mike M would agree with me here. (buy this album)
02. Ryan Adams – To Be Young – We get it, Ryan. Someone gave you a copy of The Basement Tapes and you made a career out of exploiting it to the point that you’ve saturated us with absolute crap (double albums galore!), and wasted thousands upon thousands of compact discs on the garbage you call songs. Now, can you please answer me why you feel the need to turn your accent on and off for effect on every single song you’ve ever written? A girl I had an enormous crush on for a very long time told me to buy Heartbreaker, and I really like this track. Compared to the rest of this mix, this is far-and-away the worst song I’m posting tonight. (buy this album)
03. Blur – Charmless Man – I’ve spoken at length about how Parklife and 13 are fantastic albums. But I also went through a very long phase where I enjoyed the hell out of The Great Escape and Modern Life Is Rubbish. Blur was the first band I ever saw live, and they played with The Dandy Warhols at the Roseland Ballroom in New York. I learned about the band from a Scottish guy named Colin who played a lot of golf. I owe him a huge debt of gratitude, wherever he is. (buy this album)
04. Elton John – Your Song – Somebody (I don’t remember who) told me to buy the self-titled Elton John record because it was really depressing, and I would enjoy it immensely. That person was right! Did you know that before Elton John went all dandy-fop-lisping-drag-queen-gay-homosexual, he and that guy he co-wrote songs with recorded a slew of really stark, morbid tunes? This isn’t the song I really wanted to choose from that album, but I couldn’t remember which one was my favorite, and I got nervous and picked this one at the last minute. When I remember what is actually the best song on the album, I’ll let you know. (buy this album)
05. Steven Bernstein – Chant – This took a long fucking time to find. The only reason I know what the hell it is, is because I watched all those Stella shorts about 200 times when I was a sophomore in college, and watched all the commentary tracks on the DVD they released just to find out what the hell they were playing whenever David Wain would say, “How about a little fuck music?” The DVD informed me that it was a song by Steven Bernstein, but then I had to download every single Steven Bernstein song he ever released in order to find out which one they were using. To me, that was easier and less embarrassing than getting tickets to the Stella show and asking David Wain what the name of the song was, or what album it was on. I consider those wasted hours to be a labor of love. I still listen to this all the time. It really is fuck music. Try it. (buy this album)
06. Chris Isaak – Two Hearts – It’s the song that plays during the credits of True Romance, which is one of my favorite movies. Baja Sessions as well as Heart Shaped World are vastly underrated, and I imagine if I ever construct a second Top 10 devoted to underrated albums, one of them would make that list. (buy this album)
07. Depeche Mode – Sweetest Perfection – Ian gifted me an original copy of Violator on vinyl — I think as a joke — when I first started collecting LPs, and it’s one of my favorites to listen to when I can’t decide what the hell I should have on while I work or play video games or whatever it is I do in my room. A lot of people hate Depeche Mode (and for good reason, there’s a lot of crap in their oeuvre), but this album and Songs Of Faith and Devotion are full-on great. I used to make fun of Matt in high school for liking them, but now I kind of respect him for not getting ashamed of it and throwing out all his CDs and t-shirts to win back my respect. (buy this album)
08. Randy Burns – Sorrow’s Children – I really wanted to post the first track from the album I’m A Lover, Not A Fool, because it’s a stunner, but I couldn’t find it. I bought that album as a joke for $1.99 just because someone in Mogwai once made a joke about it (probably Barry Burns), and the title always makes me giggle. Kind of like Dick Hymen’s Provocative Piano, which I own as of yesterday. Anyway, this was the first Randy Burns song I could find, so that’s the one you’re going to hear. If you can, download or buy a copy of I’m A Lover, Not A Fool, the first track is incredible. (buy this album)
09. Ol’ Dirty Bastard – Shimmy Shimmy Ya – An older friend of mine named Mike turned me onto this gem when I was probably in seventh grade. He used to walk around saying, “Ooh baby I like raw, Yeah baby I like it raw” for hours, like he was an autistic child caught in a loop. I asked him what that lyric was, and he played this song for me. I really respected Mike, because he would habitually receive blowjobs from the hottest girl in town. Not only did I go out and purchase this album because of him, I eventually traded him my gold Nick Van Exel Lakers jersey for his old school Sacramento Kings shorts. I still adore this record, and it is one of the handful of hip-hop or rap albums I listen to. (buy this album)
10. Deftones – Knife Party – Yes, I own White Pony. It’s kind of embarrassing, except this song is really, really good. Also, Maynard appears on that track “Passenger,” which is pretty cool even though I never really liked Tool. I bought Aenima for my friend John once, but that was as close as I got to listening to the band. (buy this album)
11. Jellyfish – The Man I Used to Be – Whatever. I’m sure if I flipped through your record collection I’d find a questionable purchase in there somewhere. So I like the sugary sweet baroque pop style of Jellyfish. They had some pretty cool songs. The vocalist had an above average voice. The artwork was trippy and funny. (buy this album)
12. Muse – Uno – My good friend Liad introduced me to Muse many, many moons ago. I wrote about the band in 2004, saying “Yeah, it’s chick rock, but I won’t dismiss it as complete crap.” Then, in a shocking turn of events, I wrote about them again on July 19th, 2006. This time I said, “‘Unlisteneable’ is an adjective I like to throw around sometimes when I’m slagging on bands. Consider this one of those times.” BAM! Take that you melodramatic Limey gits! You guys are overblown crap, like an amped up British version of the Arcade Fire! So why on Earth do I still think your album Showbiz contains two really good songs? (buy this album)
13. Prince – 7 – One of my lifelong heroes Brian Klugman put this on a mix tape for me in 1994. It was the first mix tape anyone other than my sister ever made for me. It included such gems as “Nickel Bag Of Funk”, “Regulators”, “So What’cha Want?”, “Cantaloupe”, “WKRP in Cincinnati”, “Blister In The Sun”, and a whole lot more. I still own it, and without a doubt I am going to put it on my hard drive and upload it for you soon (complete with the original artwork). I only own one Prince LP (Purple Rain, duh!), but if I ever find a cheap enough copy of The Love Symbol Album, that shit will be mine. (buy this album)
14. Soul Coughing – Janine – I tried to pitch woo at a girl of the same name with this song when I was in high school, hence I listened to it about twenty times a day for several months. It is my belief that after a certain number of listens, pretty much any song can work its way into your brain and convince you that it’s pretty good. Case in point: Ilya walking around singing that Evanescence song a few years ago. This is the only Soul Coughing song I know. I mean, I know they had that “Super Bon Bon” song, but I don’t even know what the hell that one was called, or what album it was on. (buy this album)
15. Bush – Mouth – I was looking for the version from the EP they put out after Razorblade Suitcase, but I couldn’t find it. It was hard not to be in a high school band in late ’90s where your regularly scheduled practices didn’t devolve into a series of Bush covers. Hell, every once in a while when I’m playing music now, if there’s an awkward silence I might start playing the intro to “Machinehead” or this song. As much as everyone in the world thinks Bush sucks…you have to admit, this one is not bad. (buy this album)
16. Silverchair – The Door – I think I saw Silverchair perform live more than any other band when I was in high school (except maybe moe. <– ha ha! I smoked pot!) I’m pretty sure the first Silverchair show was at the Trocadero with my friend Dan. I even made my own “Nobody Knows I’m A Lesbian” t-shirt after seeing Daniel Johns wear one on the MTV show was that was a precursor to “Live At The 10 Spot”. I’ve long since sold all my Silverchair possessions except for the copy of Freak Show Dan gave me, and an autographed copy of Neon Ballroom, which I hope will be worth something when those guys die. The only problem is, they’re not much older than I am, so I’m going to have to outlive them if I want to see any reward. (buy this album)
17. Talk Talk – Happiness Is Easy – I love Talk Talk, as do many people, including indie record store clerks around the world. The only difference between them and I is that they usually only listen to Laughing Stock and Spirit of Eden. For fans of the heroin-slow Talk Talk albums, The Colour Of Spring is a bit too stupid and poppy. An Amazon.com search for “Talk Talk” doesn’t even return this album on the first page of results. I happen to think the first track on the album is really good. (buy this album)
18. Oasis – Slide Away – By the end of middle school, I had amassed a collection of live Oasis VHS tapes, and could regularly be seen standing next to the TV in my family’s living room impersonating Liam Gallagher’s hands-behind-his-back, knees-slightly-bent, singing-up-into-the-microphone on-stage mannerisms. I imagine my parents and sister were quite concerned about me when they’d walk in to find me singing along loudly with the TV and mimicking the singer. One of my darkest secrets is that I can still pick up a guitar and play you any album cut or b-side that Oasis released between the years 1994 and 1997. (buy this album)
19. Ash – Darkside Lightside – As a rebellious high school freshman in 1997, I decided I was finally going to attempt to exploit the BMG mail order system I had been hearing about my entire life from older kids. Remember those “Buy 12 CDs for One Cent” deals? That’s what I’m referring to. I put down my address, and chose twelve albums. One of them was 1977, and I still can’t remember why I chose it. I had no idea what it was, I hadn’t heard about it from anybody, I just felt this weird sense of déjà vu when I saw the tiny photo of the album cover. That’s how I was introduced to Ash. One of my prized records is the band’s limited edition “Live At The Wireless” LP, which I still listen to on a semi-regular basis. Great tunes. (buy this album)
