If ever there existed a news lead that could make my blood boil, this might be it. This article over at CNN begins, “Teenager Michelle Rome can’t imagine life without instant messaging. Baby boomer Steve Wilson doesn’t care that it even exists.” Of course it’s an item about technology surpassing our nation’s poor old ‘boomers, leaving them woefully out-of-touch with their families and the rest of modern society. But hey, it’s not the fault of the ‘boomers that they don’t “get” IMs–they’re too busy being self-absorbed to worry about such trivial things as interpersonal communication!
It gets better. The AP scribe that constructed this story (who is likely a ‘boomer), in attempt to inform the uninformed, actually feels the need to define this phenomenon that is sweeping the nation as “[the] sending and receiving of…instant messages — or ‘IM-ing’.” For more side-splitting amusement, check out the rest of the article. One day you’re going to wake up , roll out of bed and say to yourself, “Jesus H. Fucknuts, you know what? That Evan is so right about ‘boomers. I hate them all!” Then you’ll run over to my place, plop down on my couch, and you’ll feel the need to pour out your heart to me (why, I don’t know). When you’ve finished sobbing, you’ll look to me for some kind of sympathy. And you know what? I’ll be there to put my hand on your shoulder and say, “It’s okay, I hate your parents and all their friends, too.”
Unfortunately, some of them happen to be talented musicians, so we can’t hate all of them…
