It was hot. We stayed in the water. It was so hot on Sunday that instead of watching the mileage from Chicago to saint Louis I kept a weary eye on the temperature gauge. the numbers were way more interesting (yes, you are reading that correctly. 106 degrees outside). My first stop for water came in Joliet. According to David Yow of The Jesus Lizard, there is a rodeo in Joliet. but really, there is no rodeo in Joliet. It’s the weirdest town i’ve yet to encounter.
I parked outside a sports bar called Samy’s and went inside to urinate. As soon as the door opened I felt the eyes on me–eyes belonging to men in Wrangler jeans, flannel shirts and NASCAR hats. One guy even followed me out of the place, but he made a sharp turn before stumbling to his car. He proceeded to open the driver’s side door, then placed a wrist to his nostrils and blew giant gobs of snot onto the steaming hot pavement. I could hear them smacking into the ground with a sickening splat one after the other. He got in his car and veered away in maniacal fashion.
Next to Samy’s was a place called Deals. Deals makes a promise that, upon entering their store, nothing costs more than a dollar. Of course, this prohibits Deals from selling anything remotely recognizable to someone from a metropolitan area. My sole intention was to find a shirt intended for a little girl into which I could squeeze my dainty frame. Their clothing section consisted mostly of accessories, like hair things and bracelets. There were some pocketbooks, with really erudite, high-society looks. One of them looked like it was made out of a bath cloth, and had “I (heart) Boys.” Not even worth a dollar. In the health care aisle I saw something that looked like cough syrup. Always the pessimist when it comes to my health I decided to take a gander. For $1 it’d be a sweet deal. It turned out to be Magnesium Citrate. I had no idea what it was, until I read the label and it said “… Onset of explosive bowel movements occurs within 1/2 hour of consumption.” Gross. Before I left I saw this shelf next to the Exit sign that had writing tools on it. There were notebooks and pens and paper and junk. Then there was a package that said, “WRITING FOLDERS FOR DUMMIES.” they’re folders with pockets for different kinds of paperwork, but made by the “…For Dummies” folks. As soon as I read this I busted out laughing and all the clerks looked at me. Oops.
From Joliet I skipped the interstate to take a detour to Aurora, Illinois. If you’re a nerd like I am, you recognize Aurora instantly for it’s connection to the Wayne’s World movies. I was disappointed that I did not see any of the sights that the movie exhibited, but I’m sure they are there somewhere.
Back on the road I passed Livingston (ew, look how gross my windows are already!), which I’m sure sucks as much as my Livingston. Rural Illinois is pretty at times. There are a ton of corn fields. I started thinking about how much corn is in my diet (the correct answer being none) and I couldn’t even begin to try comprehending how much corn the rest of the population consumes annually.
Suddenly the Gateway Arch sprung up behind a hillside and before I knew it I was in Missouri. It all came so fast I didn’t even see a welcome sign. It being overcast and humid, views of the structure and the city’s skyline were scarce at best. I passed Busch Stadium and the new Busch Stadium they’re building literally on top of the old one. Once the season is over they’re blowing up the original to finish the outfield on the new one. The stadium’s first game is going to be opening day next year.
I took 64/40 to Chesterfield, where Lindsey and Brian live. For those of you who don’t already know, Lindsey has known me since I was born (yes, there was a time when I was even more immature than I am now). She used to babysit Elissa and I. I arrived at her house and she introduced me to her husband and showed me around their cool new house in the ‘burbs. They’re a cute couple, they seem to have a ton of fun with one another. I washed up and we ate dinner. Lindsey made eggplant, pasta and salad. I told her I ate eggplant even though I’d never tried it before. Dinner was great. We drank wine and caught each other up on the last 8-9 years of our lives. We told stories about the old days and certain silly things we remembered. After dinner Lindsey made s’mores and we watched TV until she and Brian went to sleep.
Tomorrow I’ll do some sightseeing. Forest Park and Delmar Loop (I plan to eat at Blueberry Hill- where Chuck Berry still performs once a month). Then I’m off to Kansas City.
music listened to today:
dead meadow – feathers
magnolia electric co. – magnolia eletric co.
elliott smith – either/or
june of ’44 – engine takes to water
wire – chairs missing
american analog set – know by heart
rodan – rusty
